Hey Revolutionists,
I'm getting sloppy and kind of lazy, how am i suppose to complete a journey if i keep making all these pit stops and detours. ANYWAY its been kinda iffy with the writing because I've just been going through so much.
What inspired the topic?...my coworkers today, I told them about my situation and they put me ON BLAST. I was like damn, this feeling just isn't good. Well anyway one of the main things we discussed was that enough was enough and I needed to get out of this situation. But my brain just registered that i seemed to want more of it.
We all know I am not perfect and being with someone for two years who has also been with someone else sounds like an effed up situation but I don't see how I can make anyone understand. The best way I can describe it as trying to look through a car with 100% tinted windows, you keep trying to look at whats going on inside so you just make assumptions and come to your own conclusion when the only ppl who know whats going on is the people inside the car.
That is the best possible way I could have described it, like I said I am not perfect. I could wake up tomorrow morning and decide I have had enough or it could be next year. Like I said this is a journey I only have clues about where I need to be, no map no GPS, so I am taking things one day at a time.
If you are in similar situations just know that when u have had enough and you get some more, there is going to be a point where it will be beyond your control to take anymore and you will get out of that situation. SO stick it out with me, you help me ill help you..keep reading because I'm going to keep writing until i finally know where I am going and X marks the spot.
there is no way in the world that you should be okay with sharing a man with someone else. im pretty sure that you deserve much more than that. look deep down inside yourself and know that you are worth more than that. if this "man" really ccared for you and loved u as he says he wouldnt even be stringing you along. the more you stay in a toxic situation the more u become use to it and you will become to think its second nature. the more u keep going back and forth to this man u are showing him that u are weak and unable to move on with ur life. your giving him absolute power. because no matter what u say or what u do u keep coming back to him and making these detours as u say and he sees it as that. in the end when a man matures he is not going to want to settle down with a female who does not have a backbone or a say so or is strong enough to walk away and know whats good for u. i can see that u are a bright and inspiring young woman with a good head on your shoulders. and its probably going to take trial and error for you to find the perfect man FOR YOU. but sweetie know ur worth and what ur worth. and a man like that you are not worth. keep up the good work and continue what your doing because at the end of all this ur going to have an amazing story to tell and you will help a lot of young women. dont give up because God is putting u through this test for a reason!
ReplyDeleteI completely understand and if it was that easy I would have left a very long time ago...it takes time its like takin off a bandaid, you dont just want to rip it off you want to take your time and gently pull it off...im working on it
ReplyDeleteI must say that I have some experience with this topic. To be completely honest, I just ended with an ex who is also in a relationship with someone else. I did the back and forth thing with this guy for YEARS. I would cut him off, get in other relationships, only to find myslef returning to him. The difference this time is I guess TIME. As I previously stated, this had been a pattern with us for quite some time, and you do get to the point that you hit the end, and yu realize that there is no more than you can do. Also, this time I am not rushing to put a band-aid over the situation(jumping in another relationship), and I am committed to doing the work on myself to realize my worth and protect my heart. I could go on and on because my story has so much more detail...but I will end it here. But B this is Tracy from work so if you have any questions or need help getting thru this, let me know.
ReplyDeleteRip off the band-aid hun. Then throw it away. There is no easy way to get out of a situation like that and taking more time only makes it harder.Don't take an emotionalist stance when it comes to this (acting off of how you feel)-that's only going to keep you stuck in a vicious cycle. Act out of what you know. Don't fool yourself into thinking that time will make it any easier. The only thing that will happen is that you will become even more damaged and the man that God really wants to place in your life can't come because you're too buy trying to figure things out with the counterfeit who's already there. You are such an intelligent young lady, with gifts and greatness on the inside of you, but you have to come into a full realization of who you are. Forget the logistics and all the justifications of the whole situation-at the end of the day you are worth so much more than a guy who wants to have his cake and eat it too. That's not to say that things will end today and you will move on as if nothing has ever happened-that's unrealistic. However, you owe it to yourself to move forward. Instead of running back to dude, run to God-and stay there.That's the only way true healing can begin to take place. And if you allow God to process you through the heartache, you'll be able to help so many people, because you'll truly be able to say-"been there, done that, now look at me." Be encouraged and be blessed.
ReplyDeleteI just started reading all of my comments and I just wanted to say that I am truly greatly for everything everyone has shared. I want to tell my story because I know that there are more women out there like me to afraid to leave, to tell the truth or to move on and I know that in order for the story to be comeplete I have to move on. I love every one of you and i take these words deeper than you can imagine!
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