God never wants to see us hurt

Hey Revolutionists! You have been hurt before...You have been hurt countless times...I know and you question "Will I ever be Happy?" Soon I think. Don't give up just yet. Have you ever sat down and thought maybe God wasn't trying to hurt you or break your heart but just show you that the person was not right for you and you deserve better. I believe that when we fight for things God doesn't want us to have its when we hurt the most and feel the most pain. I know this all too well and even though I am far away from the situation sometimes I find myself falling into the same patterns and I am quickly reminded of the pain I have already suffered. You are struggling...I know...Its hard to move on... I have been there...Will things ever get better...With time I believe they will. I know that trust becomes impossible and Love becomes a figmant of your imagination. Just wait at the time you least expect it, he will be there right on time. When you think God shows up at the last minute he is actually right on time. Words become meaningless babble and you find it hard to even believe "I like you." You quickly over analyze and everything becomes a maze, a puzzle, some effed up game that you wish to never play. But we can't give up now, there may be one or countless others that have motives beside the good and they are going to tell you whatever they think it takes to get you. They don't know your worth and they will never treat you how you deserve. But don't be afraid dont clam up and and never allow people in or to get close. I promise Struggles = Success

When a small island...plays a BIG PART

Hey Revolutionists!! Some people think "Island life" is the best thing since slice bread, well those some people must me tourists. Yes its great to never really have a winter, have access to some of the most beautiful beaches in the world and live a virtually slow paced life away from the city drama. But there is an alternate side to this "island life". I would like to touch on a few topics that I have been faced with all my life but express how they have effected me since going to college and being away for six years! (UN)EMPLOYMENT All my life I always wanted bigger and better. When it was time to go to college, I was like "FINALLY I MADE IT!, I CAN DO WHAT I WANT!!" I got the Associates degree and the Bachelor of Science degree, worked for a year and thought I was on my way. But being in America on a student visa with no sponsorship and an expiring work permit I found everything had suddenly become in the way. It was time to come back home and though I was quickly met with "WHY ARE YOU COMING HOME?" "YOU KNOW THERE ARE NO JOBS RIGHT?" WHY DIDN'T YOU STAY, FREEPORT IS DEAD!" I still had this underlying determination that this was the path chosen by God and that I was going to make a difference. But months later with nothing but a temporary summer job under my belt paying $10 less than my first job out of college, I have found myself at a road block. It is just a lot of empty promises from Politicians and people claiming they can help me get a job. So I have come to the point where I am like what is the purpose of ever coming home if I am too qualified and I am filing and making copies for HS classmates who have never been to college. Its not an insult to them but it makes me wonder what are we all going to college for exactly? It is equally frustrating to know that "We are the future" but in order to be the future we must exist in the present situation. Individualism Some people are narrow minded. They have this "island" way of thinking, so when new and different things arise they do not know how to deal with it. I love fashion and I love thinking outside of the box, I love dressing in a way that makes me lead instead of follow. But some people cant see it that way. I feel that when you have family throwing light but equally heavy jeers (if that makes sense) is worse than them forcefully taking the clothing off of you. 7 times out of 10 someone in my family has made some type of comment about my outfit choice or the way it was put together. One time I wanted to cry because I was trying to get through to my mother that I was an individual and it didn't matter what people said or how they felt about the way that I dressed. I am tired of hearing "It is not suppose to be worn that way" or "what will people think when they see you in that." Quite frankly I DON'T CARE!! RUMORS I am not trying to make myself sound "above it" but since I can remember I have always been the target of cyber bullying and 9 times out of 10 it was over a dude. From my first love the girls didn't think that I was good enough or pretty enough to be with him and they made it known on the Internet (freeport teens). Then through the anonymous posting on one of the FB apps. Up until my final college years once again they let me know on the Internet (juicy campus). BUT living on a small island makes it a million times worse! People assume, stalk and talk a lot of shit they don't know. While being young and naive I made a lot of mistakes and a lot of bad decisions when it came to men. They lied, they manipulated and they took advantage. I have been abused in every way possible but people make it almost taboo to talk about and in most instances they give you that "you deserved it vibe!" What I observed though is that these men are ruthless and some of the women on this island have become complacent because of the lifestyles offered by these men they let they pretty much get away with whatever they want. Sad but true sweethearts are the norm and in a way I blame the women because men only get away with what we allow. They sell you a dream and when you realize that dream is nothing but a glass bottle pretending to be a diamond and you leave them, they get in their feelings. They treat you like you were the one who did something wrong. "How dare you leave me when after I cheat on you and treat you less than you deserve." I have heard the rumors about myself, heard shit I never know existed recently and as a result of that people have these preconceived notions and tainted images of who I really am. They decide to use and come into the relationship with a fabricated story line of happily ever afters and gold on the other side of the rainbow. They get you and they leave you. It has happened over and over and I'm like maybe this one will be different, maybe he is actually telling the truth and he wants to be apart of my mind, my soul and my inner beauty. Then all the lies and betrayal surface and I am left hardened. The females here make it 10x worse because they "see" one thing, interpret it another way and the rumor mill starts again. "She is a lesbian (family members included spreaded it)" She is a hoe, she been with this one and that one" "they went away together" like give it a rest, it cant be that boring here. NO ONE wants to say "I am leaving my country at the first opportunity and I am never coming back". No one wants to feel that way about their home! But no one wants to be faced with road blocks in every aspect of their life. I have dreams and hopes but my own country, my own Bahamaland keeps turning them into nightmares! continue to follow me on this journey as I make my way to self-discover and peace in this world! Love you guys!

DOUBLE STANDARDS!

Hey Revolutionists!

Today was a rough one! How rough...filing a police report rough!


I am always battling with this old age dilemma, double standards because I truly believe that I should be able to act and feel and speak how I want, not just because I am a female but because I am Bianca.

Since the beginning of my time I have ALWAYS gotten in trouble for saying whatever I felt like saying but in more cases than one it has always back fired on me. So I know you are thinking why the hell don't you stop then and just conform to what society says is right. STOP! I cant and will never allow myself to do that because if I do that means I have lose what it truly means to be Unique! (my mother didn't name me that for no reason).

So today like every other time I am wronged I decided to put the person on notice, in a more public way (funny thing my male cousin had did the exact SAME THING a couple of days ago but of course he was met with praises and likes). So I did it and you better believe it didn't turn out exactly that way. I was met with threats and black mail. I couldn't figure it out! So you lie to me and deceive me and the other female and I should just sit back and forget it (my female cousin said i should have just "let it go"). That's insane, why as women we should just let men get away with whatever they want and "let it go". Its disturbing and it just goes to show that we are not as evolved as we think we are. If you cheat you should suffer the consequences, it is as simple as that.

I sat back horrified for a moment thinking of how this person could be so cruel and heartless after it was there tip that set off the whole thing. I am constantly having an internal battle, do I do whats right or do what people think is right? Sometimes you have to be the sacrificial lamb, to see changes happen and to make people aware. Its going to be hard but I am going to continue to stick to my guns and be me, Bianca Unique Strachan. I cant live any other way.

John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

So continue to follow me on this journey as i make my way to self discovery, I love u guys!

Is it possible just to have fun?

Hey guys,

I am really trying to get better with keeping everyone up to date. Next topic I really wanted to focus on is " Is it possible just to have fun?" Basically nothing serious, no strings attached and no one gets jealous.

I personally do not think its possible unless both parties have just gotten out of something serious and they really are not interested in settling down at the moment. Or it could be some crazed bachelor who is never thinking about settling down.

As a woman who truly believes in love in what it represents I feel like everyone should go into something not just to have fun but to make it meaningful. I knew at the beginning of summer I was very adamant on having fun and chilling and focusing on what I needed to do. But as I continue this journey I realize that not only do I need more, I honestly deserve more.

The last couple of years have been filled with drama and heartbreak and I honestly think that I am ready to make that commitment. It just takes the right kind of man to offer what I want and I am not settling for anyone who comes trying to half ass it.

I believe that our generation has lost what it truly means to love and be in love. There is a lot of focus on money and power but at the end of the day you don't want to end up lonely. I am going on record saying lets not just have fun lets make it mean more.

This whole no strings attached is funny too. I hear ppl say it all the time but it never works out that way. Someone ends up catching feelings and then the whole thing basically serves no purpose. It would all work out better if people went into it with a different perspective on what they want the relationship to be.

Continue to follow or join me on this revolution to self discovery and ever lasting happiness ....i love u guys!

Can males and females be platonic friends??

Hey Revolutionists,

I am honestly getting tired of writing that its been too long or that I need to write more often and I am pretty sure you are tired of hearing it.

Well since I have been home I have had a lot of free time on my hands but I wasn't exercising it properly. Well this topic came to mind because lately I have been noticing that I have been cool with people but I think that they have been taking it another way.

I use to be one of those ppl who truly believed that it was possible but I soon realized how naive I was to think that. I think that there is no way a male and a female can be strictly friends, someone always has a motive.

So after all this friend business, what exactly do you do when you see the conversation starts to switch and before you know it, you are being asked..."what is your favorite position"

I need insight!

A different world

Hola Revolutionists!!!
Its been a while since I have written on here but every writer knows that the next chapter is only a page away no matter how long it takes to be written. Since the last time I have been on here A LOT has happened!

For starters I am back home in the Bahamas and while it was great to get away from life inw the fast lane, im finding it hard to cope at such a slow and laid back pace. The island life is great for vacationing but once you have been exposed to something bigger and its hard to go back small. It feels great that my mind is free and I most certainly have nor brought the stressors of Maryland with me.

But one of the cons of living in a big city and moving to a small island is that you still have big city habits! The rumors formed faster than I had time to fully unpack. Its funny though while people arw concerned with my life, im concerned about the next step to building ny empire. So not only do I have a headstart on them, they are most likely never going to catch up. By the time they realize what happened I would have already made it to the top and they would have wasted their lives foolishly.

Continue to follow me on this journey helping heal one broken heart at a time <3

Breaking Insanity

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results"- Albert Einstein

Hey Revolutionists!
How many times have you tried studying a certain way but you keep failing quizzes, You keep approaching relationships a certain way but you keep getting hurt in the end? Maybe its time for a change.

I always question myself as to why I am always the one who ends up unhappy in the end and I had to take a deep look within to find out exactly what it was that I was doing so that I could change it. I came to the conclusion that I had to start completely from scratch. Throw out all those rules and notes and methods to approaching life situations and just start over.

I am doing that with regards to school, work, my social and love life and I have come to find out that starting over is the best way. I know I said that in the new year i was only making improvements and thats exactly what I am doing; improving the way I think and act about things without really changing who I truly am.

I am still going to have the same morals and values and now I have a better self worth because I know that I deserve better. I am going to take the next couple months to test myself and truly see if it was those old methods that brought negative results and if the new ones can reveal positive ones.

My most important goal in life is to be able to say that I made it, regardless of all the hate and negativity that was thrown my way, I made it.

I want every person who has truly been hurt to try new approaches, I am not saying that its totally your fault for getting hurt but there are some things we have to own up to.

When I started this revolution I had one thing in mind and that was for women not to end up bitter and for them to believe that it was possible to find true love regardless of the amount of times they got hurt!

Late Night thinking

Hey Revolutionist,
Its almost 4 in the morning and I cant sleep. If you knew me you would know that's nothing new for me. Once again if you knew me you would know that my life is complicated. I feel like the minute I am happy, here comes a million and 1 things trying to knock it down. The one thing that is different this time though is that I am the one who is in complete control of my happiness. Before this I use to let what other people do, say and how they treat me effect my happiness, well not anymore.

There is no worse feeling though than being constantly accused and being stigmatized because someone wants to form negative opinions about you. The one thing I can pride myself in saying is that I am open a book. I have flaws, I admit them all the time, I am not perfect and I don't try to be. But the one thing I wont ever stand again as long as I live is giving a man the power to degrade me and determine my worth. I am tired of taking on the defeatist attitude when someone hurts me or does something wrong. I am tired of giving men complete and utter control to have a reign of terror over my head.

All my years of living I have learned that whenever someone has made up their mind about you without a primary source (you), do not give that person a second out of your day to plead your case. Ignorance is bliss, let them shine in it.

A girl gets tired of the false rumors and fabricated stories but people must be talking for a reason. At the end of the day no matter how long it takes, the truth always comes out. My faith cannot be deterred, I know that I am still her for a purpose. I believed in strength, I got strong and not God is using me to help others...nothing great comes easy...

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose ROMANS 8:28

Me and God are on the same page

Hey Revolutionists,
Each day it is becoming exceedingly clear what the path is God wants me to take. For so long I kept wondering why was it that I felt like I had to do everything on my own. That's just what it was, God wanted me to do everything on my own so that I could learn to be strong, become strong and use my strength to help others. Every now and then I look up and i break down a little but then there is this voice from with in that tells me everything is going to be OK.

There is no reason to question God or question the things that you are going through because every step you take and move you make God has mapped out for you. Do not let the worries and sins of the world blind you from your true destination. Some times you might fall off your path but just know you will always make it back to where you need to be.

I have faith in abundance and I know that when its my turn it is going to be great. God knows where I have been and he knows where I am going to be. He lets us make these decisions and gives us choices so that he knows when we are ready to make it on our own. He chooses certain people and gives them more of a load than others because he knows what we can handle. People always wonder why some people have it easier than the rest, that is not up to you to wonder. Just know that God knows what he is doing, he knows us best.

Quick words from my heart just to let every know where my life is at the moment. Continue to follow me on this journey to happiness and self-discovery!! love u guys.

Jeremiah 1:5
'And before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee; and before thou camest forth of the womb, I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

Who am I?

Hey Revolutionists,
How are you today? Well I am a little bummed out but I also cant dwell...I am not a perfect woman and I never claimed to be. What I am is a woman who is imperfect and I do have flaws. But the one positive thing I believe in is helping others. I believe that there are some people that are put here on this earth to go through certain things and overcome very powerful obstacles so that they can help others with their own experiences.

I am a very passionate person when I believe in something. I am also not easily impressed and my biggest pet peeve is to have someone tarnish my name. I lost a friend today because she did one of those things. I am a lot of things but I am a person who would never use something someone told me as ammunition against them. I don't believe that is what friendship is about. I think that the worse thing someone can do is use something against me I was already hurting from. I would never in life trust that person the same way and I would never in life be friends with a person like that again.

When you try to help people, they take it the wrong way. I love my friends dearly and when they hurt I honest to God hurt along with them. So who am I to want them happy and to want them to see the things I have been through and learn from it. The lows that I have experienced I wouldn't wish that on my worse enemy. The problem with some women is that we get confused when we are in love and that brings out the worse in us.

The purpose of this blog and I believe the purpose of my life is to prevent as much broken hearts as possible and to show women signs that may be happening from the beginning so as to prevent any hurt. I feel like everyday is a test. Everyday I am losing a friend. People find it easier to call me crazy than to understand me.

I am a woman who have been hurt. I am a woman who have lost friends. I am a woman with dreams. I am a woman who have love and lost. I am a fighter but most of all .I AM ME. I feel like in order for me to get where I need to be I am going to lose people along with way but its all apart of the sacrifice I am making now to get where I need to be...

Continue to follow me on this journey to self discovery, healing one broken heart at a time!

Free

Hey REVOLUTIONISTS,
How have you guys been, Well I have been great, besides a few things that is beyond my control things have changed for the better in everything else. When I went home for a few weeks it was the happiest I have ever been in years. I was around family and friends and the weather wasn't too bad either.

When I was home I didn't think about the drama and the pain or the hurt that came along with Maryland, I was on a high and no one could bring me down. I think that people could feel the positive vibes from me because I wasnt doing too bad in the men department either lol.

You know whats so crazy, it didnt take a tragic event, or me crying or some big sign for me to finally be done with q, it was a simple gesture, a feeling that the person who I was talking to was the right move to make. He complimented me everyday and he made me feel like I was going to be the only one. After all those years of being hurt and belittled by a man who I gave my all to, I finally realized that there were other people out there who was willing to do whatever it took to keep a smile on my face and that lifted me.

I would be lying if I said that I was completely over the situation and that I didnt love him anymore but I had to move on before I imploded. I was holding on to something that God didnt want me to have and that is why I got hurt so bad. Now I finally feel free, sometimes I find myself smiling for no reason. honestly it isnt because I have a new boyfriend (it is part of the reason). It is because I found the strength to move on.

The biggest mistake women make is letting a man determine their happiness, letting men control their emotions and letting men determind their worth. Once you take control of your life, you are the only one who can make you happy.

Continue to follow me on this journey to self discovery and happiness...love u guys!

I became all too familiar...#in2010

Hey Revolutionists!!
Its a new year and for the life of me I WILL NOT SAY "ITS A NEW ME". A good friend once told me that I should never change because she loves me just the way I am. So going into this new year I am going to say that I am only making improvements and deletions. Even a car in great condition needs a tune up and oil change once in a while. With deletions being mentioned I realized that there were a lot of negative people in my life who just brought out something bad in me, something that was destroying me from within..something I just couldn't allow to happen anymore!

#in2010 I almost lost my way, I was taken so far off my path I had to crawl blind just to get back where I needed to be. I felt like I had taken my own self hostage and that I held my own happiness for Ransom, waiting for someone else to come along and pay. BIG MISTAKE...I kept trying to let other people determine my self worth and kept giving the responsibility of being happy to someone else.

#in2010 I allowed myself to become consumed and fight for something that GOD did not want me to have and that is why I fell so hard and hurt so bad. When you decide to go up against someone as powerful as God when you decide to challenge the destiny he has laid out for you is when you seek the biggest downfall.

#in2010 I was forever grateful for the handful of friends and family that I could depend on no matter what. I tried everything in my power to push me away but they held on didn't budge and helped me through til the end. For them I am forever grateful.

#in2010 I lost one of my best friends I don't think she knows how hurt I was over it. I don't know how it happened but it did. I know that you cant force people to understand or make them see what you see but I really thought she would be there for me til the end. I know there are always three sides to a story but my version was that she held our friendship for convenience, it was a lot of things that happened and I didn't understand why she was doing it but in the end she chose the people she wanted to be with and I honestly believe we can never go back to the way things were. Just one of those things you have to let go but still cherish. I always love her.

#in2010 I was called pathetic, desperate, crazy and every other derogatory name in the book because I had loved a man. A man who I probably wasn't suppose to fall in love with in the first place, because the more i loved him, the more pain I felt...I kept trying to hold on to something I was not suppose to have, well not at this moment.

I wouldn't let people in, I wouldn't let other men love me, I was too afraid to be hurt again. I didn't know how to move on. But one night I found myself doing something real stupid and I sat in my living room on my laptop looking at the words I was typing not for me but for someone else and I realized that I was done. Strange thing, Keri hilson's song "Breaking point" came on and it was like the words were being imprinted on my heart "Every woman has a breaking point ya’ll (breaking point)
Hey, I know you know, some women can be lied to And cheated on, and beated on
Somebody know, Every woman has a breaking point"...there was a limit to my love and even though i had endured all of those things something just broke inside me and I knew that I had had enough of it all.

#in2010 my father died, I know that I had written about him a couple of times just saying how he had never been there for me and how bout I always wanted a father. I wanted to just tell him all these things and just let him know how I felt. But I can never get a chance to do that because he is gone. I haven't really cried, my emotions have been all over the place, i just don't know. But the hardest part about losing him was not hearing from some of my own close friends, I felt like a lot of people should have reached out to me who didn't but in the end it just makes the deletion process easier.

I hate cutting people out of my life but some times its a necessary pain to get to a positive experience. I truly believe that people come into your life for a reason. My mother, Candy, Brittany, TJ,Shanti, Ashley, Bre, Ashley Harris and countless other family and friends but Quintin came into my life and it was an experience, he became a test of Faith and he became a constant obstacle that I fought for 2.5 years. Because of him I know what true love is and isn't I know my worth and I know how to be strong.

#in2011 I am not going to change my core values I am only going to embrace the lessons I have learnt and the few people I have taken with me. The journey is not quite over, its really just beginning I love everyone who has helped me get this far, I wouldn't trade my life for anything in the world.